Opening Words:

Dr. Rickards:   I want to welcome everyone on this happy occasion. We are here today to celebrate the union of David C. and Amy R. David and Amy believe that marriage is made up of two types of promises, the first being a promise made between two individuals, and the second being a promise that is made by the couple to society.

David and Amy believe that the feelings they share for one another are precious.

They have found happiness and serenity in their life together, and they stand here today because they have promised one another that they will actively seek to nurture that happiness and make it grow with them throughout the rest of their lives.  This is the individual promise that they have made.

David and Amy also feel that by marrying they are also making a promise to the world at large.  They have promised as individuals to provide one another with strength and support.  They are promising as a couple to provide strength and support to others--to their families, and to their friends.

They are also acknowledging the responsibilities that accompany marriage in our society, and they are promising society that their marriage will be a GOOD example for others to emulate, one based upon mutual trust and respect and filled with love and happiness.  They promise that honor and respect will take precedence over petty differences and selfish desires.  They promise to be patient with one another, and to cherish one another's unique characteristics.

Finally, they promise that  the love they feel for one another  will be apparent in their lives and will serve as a good example for everyone who knows them.

David and Amy, are you now ready to stand together and pledge your vows to one another openly and without reservation?

David and Amy:  We are.

VOWS:

Dr. Rickards:    Please hold each other's opposite hand and look at one another. This is called "handfasting," and it is one of the oldest rituals associated with the marriage ceremony.

Dr. Rickards:    David, do you want Amy to be your wife, and do you promise to share your life with her, to love, honor and respect her, and to do everything in your power to make your lives together happy?

David  I do.

Dr. Rickards:    Amy, do you take David to be your husband, and do you promise to share your life with him, to love, honor and respect him, and to do everything in your power to make your lives together happy?

Amy:         I do.

RING CEREMONY:

(Dr. Rickards gets rings from Doug, who hopefully will have them in his jeans pocket <grin>)

Dr. Rickards:   David, taking this ring as a symbol of love and a token of unity, will you please place it on Amy's finger and ask her to be your wife?

David:               (taking ring, placing it on Amy's finger)
Amy, will you be my wife?

Amy:                 Yes, David, with all my heart.  (provided, of course, that you promise from this day forward to always keep track of my car keys) <grin>

Dr. Rickards:   Amy, taking this ring as a symbol of love and a token of unity, will you please place it on David's finger and ask him to be your husband.

Amy:                 (taking ring, placing it on David's finger)

David, will you be my husband?

David:              Yes, Amy, with all my heart.

CONCLUDING REMARKS (Dr. Rickards).

The Wedding of Stephanie and Paul
December 31, 1999
Rocky River Metropark, Cleveland, Ohio
Dr. Rick Rickards, Humanist Minister, officiating

[7:40] - Guests are invited to take seats by Scott and DJ.
Colleen , Minister, Scott standing at front of room facing tables. [Scott holds two thornless roses which have wedding rings on their stems attached by ribbons in bows.]

Guests seated at tables. Tables arranged so that there is aisle to front.

[7:45] Music begins - non-traditional instrumental "In the Eyes of Love"
[7:46] Paul enters with parents. Parents sit right at front table.
[7:46:30] Stephanie enters with parents. Parents sit left at front table.
[7:48] Timed so music ends and Minister speaks [Or DJ fades music ].

[The couple stand facing the guests, Stephanie to my right, Paul to my left]

Ceremony Introduction/Homily: [7:48]:

Dr. Rickards: Welcome. Paul and Stephanie thank you all for coming. We are here tonight to witness the wedding of Stephanie and Paul. It is an appropriate evening. As most of you know, Paul and Stephanie met at a New Year's Eve party five years ago . It is an interesting story, because they might never have met if it hadn't been for the chocolate brownies. It seems that Paul had strategically positioned himself near the dessert table, shamelessly flirting with any of the women stopping by. Stephanie was forced to talk with him if she was to get any of the delicacies. That's how it all began. The rest is history!

This night has some additional benefits for Paul and Stephanie. They will never have to worry about remembering their wedding anniversary! Nor will their families, for that matter.

Seriously, I know it gives Stephanie and Paul great pleasure to have this ceremony occur on this very night with their families and dear friends.

Paul and Stephanie would also like to remember that tonight we bring extended families together. Family love has an intrinsic awareness of time since family love springs forth from marital love. Family love achieves timelessness, in a shared belonging to a chain of generations. Paul and Stephanie wish to remember, with pride, the memories of their great grandparents and grandparents. Paul's wedding band is that of his great-grandfather's Al.

[Brief Pause]

Dr. Rickards: I'd like to tell you another story about Paul. As some of his family might know, Paul isn't much of a gardener. One day, Paul was in the front of his house trying to figure out what to do with his rose bushes. He wasn't having much success. A neighbor, who was watching him, came over to show him how to cut the roses back in order to encourage their growth. The elderly lady had a story to share with Paul…

"My husband and I bought our house when we were in our 20's." she said, "In our back yard there was a rose garden. We didn't think much of it at first, and we certainly didn't know much about gardening. Even so, the flowers were quite beautiful. As the years went by we learned how to tend it. During the summer, nearly every day, we would spend time, pruning the bushes, clearing off dead leaves, and watering the garden."

"My husband and I were married nearly 45 years ." She continued. "Every spring he would cut me the first rose of the season and present it with a kiss. Every fall, before the first frost, he would cut me the last rose of the year and do likewise.

Then she added, "Our marriage wasn't always blissful my dear - but it worked. It worked because we took care of it, like our roses. "You should try to do the same as we did!" she suggested, and she walked away.

One of my favorite sayings is - "It is easy to get married, but hard to stay married." "Love does not create marriage - intentional, conscious marriage creates love." Marriages are like gardens of roses. Left neglected they grow wild and bear some flowers, but they will not flourish. Tended, they flourish growing to great beauty and bear exquisite flowers. Intentional, conscious work over years nourishes a marriage and makes it grow stronger and more wonderful with each passing season.

After presiding over dozens of marriages in my years as a humanist minister, I can think of no greater advice to Paul and Stephanie than remember that they are making a choice tonight. It is a choice, as Paul's neighbor observed, that requires constant work. But with the choice, and with the labor of love and good health, we hope they will celebrate their golden wedding anniversary a half century from now.

Readings:

Dr. Rickards: At this point in the ceremony, Stephanie and Paul have short readings that they would like to make to one another.

 [~7:54] [ Paul and Stephanie Facing Each Other ]

 [~7:54] [Stephanie Reads]
Stephanie: [Partially to Audience, Partially to Paul] This is a reading from an Anonymous source. It pretty much says how I feel about Paul.
[To Paul] "When we first met, you caught my interest-
Maybe it was something I saw in your eyes,
Or maybe it was something about your smile
When we started to spend time together,
I discovered how much fun you were -
You filled my life with laughter.
As we got to know each other better,
I knew I'd found a wonderful friend -
It seemed we could talk about anything.

 Reading - To Paul]

[7:54:30] Somewhere along the way we fell in love - It was a wonderful feeling, and every thing just seemed so right I found love and happiness for a lifetime- I love you, and I'm so glad I have you in my life."

[Brief Pause]

Paul, I would like you to be my husband.

Dr. Rickards: Scott, would you please hand Paul the roses.

[~7:55:00] [ Scott Hands Roses to Paul.] [Paul Faces Stephanie Holding Two Roses].

Paul: [Partially to Audience, Partially to Stephanie] Begins]

This is a short reading from the Little Prince by Antoine De Saint-Exupery. In this reading, the Little Prince sees a rose bush that looks like his rose, but is not. To me, the rose symbolizes marriage, and the commitment it requires.

[To Stephanie] "So the prince tamed the fox . . . [Then the little prince saw a garden of roses] "'you are not at all like my rose," ,' he said.

"'As yet you mean nothing to me. No one has tamed you, and you have tamed no one. You are like my fox when I first knew him. He was only a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But I have made him my friend, and now he is unique in all the world . . .

"'You are beautiful, but I do not know you," he went on. "'One could not die for you. To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you - the rose that belongs to me. But in herself alone she is more important than all the hundreds of you other roses: because it is she that I have watered . . . because it is she that I have sheltered . . . because it is she that I have listened to, when she grumbled, or boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose.".'

And he went back to meet [his true friend] the fox."'Goodbye," ,' he said. "Goodbye," said the fox. [The fox continued] "And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: it is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye . . .

"'It is the time you have devoted to your rose that makes your rose so important . . . "You have become responsible, forever, for your rose."

[Brief Pause]

Stephanie, I love you tenderly.
I wish to make you my wife.
And to give you the first rose
And the last rose of the year
For the rest of my life.

[Paul hands roses to Stephanie - And they both Hold Roses with Hands Clasped, Facing Each Other - Stephanie Holds Rose with Paul's Ring. Paul Clasps Rose with Stephanie's Ring]

Vows:

[~7:57:45] [Minister Begins to Speak]

Dr. Rickards: At this point, Paul and Stephanie will exchange the vows that they have written. Paul, please repeat after me, speaking to Stephanie. I promise . . .

Paul: I promise . . .

Dr. Rickards: to be your best friend and confidant . . . .

Paul: to be your best friend and confidant . . .

Dr. Rickards: to make you laugh, | to laugh with you, | and sometimes to laugh at you . . .

Paul: to make you laugh, | to laugh with you, | and sometimes to laugh at you .. .

Dr. Rickards: to constantly work on our friendship and marriage . . . .

Paul: to constantly work on our friendship and marriage . . .

Dr. Rickards: but most of all, | to love you with all my heart | for the rest of my life.

Paul: but most of all | to love you with all my heart | for the rest of my life.

Dr. Rickards: Stephanie, please repeat after me, speaking to Paul. I promise .
. .
Stephanie: I promise . . .
Dr. Rickards: …to be your best friend and confidant . . . .
Stephanie: …to be your best friend and confidant . . .
Dr. Rickards: to make you laugh, | to laugh with you, | and sometimes to laugh at you . . .
Stephanie: to make you laugh, | to laugh with you, | and sometimes to laugh at you . . .

Dr. Rickards: to constantly work on our friendship and marriage . . . .

Stephanie: to constantly work on our friendship and marriage . . .

Dr. Rickards: but most of all, | to love you with all my heart | for the rest of my life.

Stephanie: but most of all, | to love you with all my heart | for the rest of my life.

RING CEREMONY

Dr. Rickards: Paul, please offer Stephanie her ring. Paul, do you accept Stephanie into your heart as your mate and life partner; do promise to love and cherish her, to respect and encourage her growth as a woman, and to constantly labor with her on your marriage for as long as you shall live?

Paul: I do.

[Paul and Stephanie Stop Clasping Hands; Paul Takes Rose with Stephanie's Ring, leaving rose with his ring with Stephanie; Removes Ring from Rose Stem].

Paul: Stephanie, this ring is a symbol of my commitment to you. [Slips Ring on Finger].

Dr. Rickards: Stephanie, please offer Paul his ring. Stephanie, do you accept Paul into your heart as you mate and life partner; do you promise to love and cherish him, to respect and encourage his growth as a man, and to constantly labor with him on your marriage for as long as you shall live?

Stephanie: I do

[Stephanie Removes Ring from Rose Stem].

Stephanie: Paul, this ring is a symbol of my commitment to you. [Slips Ring on Finger].

Dr. Rickards: Stephanie and Paul, by your own words and your own actions you have married each other. Why don't you seal your vows with a kiss?

[Paul and Stephanie kiss].

[~8:00:40]

Dr. Rickards: Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, I present to you, THE NEWLYWEDS… Stephanie and Paul.

[Pause]

I think you should walk out the same way you walked in, but as Bride and Groom. Then the Best Man and Matron of Honor and then the Minister. The DJ can announce when you will be back and tell everyone to have a drink ready for the toasts. Or, if the DJ has no second microphone, I will stay on the podium and after the excitement subsides I will make the announcement. Music?

[Music by DJ - Traditional Wedding Ending Music]

[Stephanie and Paul Exit together]